1983 Kajagoogoo: Too Shy

If Duran Duran and Spandau Ballet represented an eighties rivalry equivalent to the Beatles and the Stones of the sixties (in purely analogous terms you understand), then Kajagoogoo would be bringing up the rear as a kind of latter day Freddie and the Dreamers. Whereas Duran Duran led the way in the love it or hate it New Romantic genre, Kajagoogoo were very much the annoying kid brother hell bent on tagging along three steps behind and exuded a 'me too, me too' aura over everything they did.

'Too Shy' is a typical slab of half baked synth heavy eighties pop dressed up in the lamest of white boy funk clothing. A horrible slap bass runs through the scales in the background and busily slaps out a multitude of notes without once managing to string them together in anything approximating a groove, while a patchwork of Roland synthesiser and electronic drum fills try to paper over the cracks and give the impression that there is something of substance here. But there isn't. And with lyrics like "Modern medicine falls short of your complaints. Ooh, try a little harder.You're moving in circles, won't you dilate. Baby try", how could there be?

From Limahl's weedy vocal in (his cries of 'Hey girl, move a little closer' sound more akin to someone grooming an underage child than anything remotely sensual) 'Too Shy' is all surface and no depth - a dish of starters with no main course and a chorus that only manages to break ranks and come to the fore because of the blandness that surrounds it. In fact, to modern ears 'Too Shy' sounds almost a parody of what an eighties band ought to sound like - I half expect the band to pull off their rubber masks in the video to reveal the Not The Nine O'Clock News team grinning underneath. Nice video, shame about the song indeed. And as for that song, it's as inconsequential and manufactured as a bowl of Angel Delight and just as nourishing; 'Too Shy' is a quick sugar fix that seems to exist solely for the purpose of existing. Only unlike the aforementioned sugary topping, prolonged exposure will rot your ears rather than your teeth.